I don't have a lot of time, so I will just write random one sentence summaries of my day to give you a taste.
Nothing is worse than hearing your daughter cry in her sleep. What is she dreaming of that is making her cry? Is it of me? Is she dreaming of being hurt, ignored, unloved? My poor girl.
Why, pray tell, is Loki ravenously hungry when I need to get Jeanne either on the potty or down for a nap? aka, when I need two hands...
For a 'wimpy white boy' who needed to spend 5 days in the NICU, he sure has one set of lungs on him!
Remember to breathe Crystal.
I hate that this thought went through my head today: "If he's screaming, he's alive".
Oh, WOW, Crystal! I'm feeling for you. Your last comment about him being alive if he's crying is some great wisdom to live by for now -- don't feel guilty for that. You have to live too, and so do Jeanne and Paul ;)
ReplyDeleteOne of my babies was like this and, while I love to remember my soft-skinned son and his tininess, I don't have fond memories of his infancy. My neighbor would come relieve me in the evening(while Matt was at school until late) sometimes because of that intense, never stopping cycle of crying. And then I'd go cry in the other room or in the shower or something. Let me tell you something to give you hope. . . he's 5 now and he IS. MY. HAPPIEST. CHILD. There is something so night and day different about him now and how he was. Learning to move on his own helped us get past this stage. Also, have you read "The Happiest Baby?" I think that's the book with the 5 S's that magically help calm a baby. I'll swear by those tricks. I learned those later with him and wished I'd known them sooner.
I know you didn't solicit advice from me and I'm sorry if this is too much :) You're such a great mom -- hang in there! This is hard. And, hooray for Paul for relieving you.